Straightening Things Out

The donor goes for his testing Tuesday evening. I really think he's the ideal donor, so lets hope it goes well!

C and I have been talking quite a bit the last 24 hours. I'm a control freak. I have a really hard time letting go of responsibilities. If something needs to be done I feel like I have to do it. If I don't do it it won't get done right, or it won't get done at all. Because of this I've been handling everything. I've done all the paperwork for our donor contract, all the research into insemination, all the financial planning. Everything. I need to be able to pass some things off to C, but I'm not sure how to handle that. If I do give her things to do one of two things will happen... I'll hate how she does it (cause I'm anal) and I'll redo it, or I'll feel like she isn't getting it done in time and I'll nag her until we fight about it. Then she'll do it just to get me off her back... Which will irritate me and I'll redo it just so it isn't tainted by the fact that she did it in anger.

See the issue here?

So, I was going to talk to the girl tonight about it, but she's basically in the process of flipping the f*** out... so I'll be waiting to talk to her about it later. When I talked to her she was at that "so angry nothing else can possibly enter my mind" point. We all know I've been there before, so I can understand... I just gotta wait for her to simmer a little while now.

Since I couldn't talk to the girl tonight I sat back down here at my computer and ended up talking to the person I least expected to ask questions about babies. She hates kids. Always has. Has no interest in children. But I didn't even bring it up... she prompted the conversation and ended up being the venting point for me that the girl wasn't able to be this evening. Surprised me, but it was nice...