Bad Day Yesterday

The day started off innocently enough. I took a walk around the neighborhood with C discussing where we plan to start house shopping. It was nice, relaxing, beautiful. Then, about 11, I started getting horrible cramps. Hate PMS. I had only a four hour shift at work, which was awesome, but I had to work a pallet of 40lb bags of dog food. THEN my coworker lost track of time, took her lunch break too late, so there was no opportunity for me to take a 15 minute break.

On top of that, my manager announced wanting a store meeting this coming sunday at 6:30. Exactly when Donor #1 is supposed to be coming over to give us his answer. I told her I can't make it, she said she'll look into scheduling it for the next week. She really is a wonderful person, and I have to make sure I tell her that today since I'm in a better mood. But even though she's willing to reschedule it was just a punch in the stomach to have her say that. We've tried four times to get him over for dinner. We've asked the question, and we're just waiting for a dinner date to get his answer. It seemed like her announcing this meeting was just another roadblock. A frustrating roadblock. Just standing in our way, making this even more difficult than it needs to be.

It's not that I need him to say yes. I just need him to give us an answer so that we can move on to asking donor #2 if he does say no. Because the longer we take getting an answer from him, and the possibility of him not being willing to do it, make it that much longer before we can start trying to get pregnant, that much longer before we SUCCEED at getting pregnant... That much longer before we have the family we dream of.

But, this morning our parrot actually let me sleep until 8:30 (usually he wakes me as soon as C leaves for work at 6:30) and so I'm taking that as a sign that today will be a good day! I'm going to take a shower, fill my travel mug with coffee, and go for a walk to wake myself up. And I'm NOT going to think about babies for the next hour...